A Gift from the Goddess novel Chapter 153

“You know me?” I asked, surprised.

She’d somehow known my name and implied we’d met already once before. Had we been childhood friends maybe? But that would have been back when I was five years old, her maybe even younger than me. That would be such a long time ago to recall.

Despite this though… I had a nagging in my head as if I’d heard her name recently. Somewhere I couldn’t quite place… At Ashwood perhaps? No… that didn’t seem right.

Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to think on it for long though.

At my question, Clarissa instantly looked even less enthused, her eyes narrowing slightly.

“…What kind of dumb question is that?” she replied curtly.

“Clarissa!” Myra snapped. “Where are your manners? Apologise. Right now.”

“But, Myra…,” she whined. “It’s not—.”

However, Clarissa wasn’t able to finish her sentence, another coughing fit wracking through her chest.

“…Stupid girl,” Myra sighed, walking over to her bedside.

She wrapped the tiny girl back in her blanket and forced her to lie down once more.

“Rest… you can talk later when you’re feeling stronger,” Myra said. “You won’t do yourself any favours by pushing yourself.”

“But I’m not feeling that b—.”

Assumedly, the new fit of coughing contradicted whatever she was about to say.

“Rest,” Myra ordered.

And all I could hear was mumbling complaints from the bedsheets as I was ushered back outside the room.

“Sorry about her. She can be a bit… blunt sometimes. Thinks she always knows better than everyone else.”

“It’s fine. No offence taken,” I said, waving off the apology. “I am curious though… would it be okay to tell me what’s wrong with her?”

Myra’s face then grew serious, her eyes casting down.

“I wish I knew…,” she said slowly. “She’s been prone to sickness ever since I found her. Over the years it got progressively worse, though it was still manageable. But then, one day, it was as if she suddenly couldn’t get out of bed at all anymore. Like a switch overnight. She was still mostly okay one day… and then the next she became what you see now. The poor thing….”

Since Myra found her…? So, that meant….

“You couldn’t keep looking for me all those years ago… because you had to take care of Clarissa,” I stated, putting the pieces together.

Myra became quiet and, after a moment had passed, reluctantly nodded her head.

“…You had to choose between us.”

“I couldn’t drag a four year old around, especially whilst we were being hunted,” she explained. “And Clarissa isn’t like you… her appearance wouldn’t pass as normal as I knew yours would be able to. Then adding into the mix that she was sick as well….? It meant I would be endangering her life for the small chance that I would be able to find you. A chance that felt slimmer than finding a needle in a haystack.”

“…Clarissa needed you more.”

I didn’t say it with a tone of understanding, more so like it was an irrefutable fact.

“I’m all she has. Everyone else from her family has died,” she said quietly. “I might not be related to her by blood but… every time I look at her… it’s like I can see my best friend still alive. I couldn’t just abandon her.”

Myra was all I’d had as well, my only blood family remaining. Didn’t that count for something?

I felt as tears began to sting at my eyes over hearing this, listening to how I’d had to suffer growing up because Clarissa was made a priority. Did I resent her for that? I wasn’t sure. If I did, then I knew it was incredibly selfish of me to think so. It wasn’t anyone’s fault, least of all Clarissa’s.

“…But I know now that I made the right choice,” she continued, looking back towards me. “It’s a relief to finally see that.”

I frowned. She was happy that she chose her over me?

“What…?”

Myra moved closer and touched under my chin, lifting my face up.

“You clearly grew up to be so smart… so beautiful,” she said. “I can feel an aura of strength surrounding you, something that tells me you were more than capable of looking after yourself. It’s obvious that you didn’t need me, Rheyna.”

I bit back at the tears threatening to fall, holding my face firm.

Because I’d never intended to become strong. I’d had to in order to survive. Every single day was another trial, another test… another assignment. Failure was considered worse than death.

And not just that, but being poisoned… to have no control over my wolf. To not understand my ability, nor myself. To be unworthy of my mate. My life was a mess… *I* was a mess. A danger to anyone who got too close.

“…I’m far from perfect, Myra,” I said honestly, trying to keep my voice steady. “I wouldn’t praise me for anything. My upbringing was incredibly challenging, one where I had to do terrible things… a basis for many of the issues I’m still battling to this day. I have almost no control over any of it.”

“Well… I might not be able to fix what is already done…,” she said, looking as if she was about to cry herself. “But I can perhaps help you with what I can. Like for example, your ability… It’s important that you learn how to keep that in check. Firing it off without realising can be dangerous, especially when you’re quite gifted with it as you seem to be.”

…Yes, that was just one problem of many plaguing me.

However, part of me wanted to argue back, to point out that things couldn’t be fixed that easily by just helping one thing. But I knew this would be a very petty reaction, one stemming purely out of my exhaustion and from the emotionally charged atmosphere of the situation.

No, just as she had said, she couldn’t fix the things already done. There was no point blaming her for everything that had gone wrong in my life.

…And so, I just sighed, forcing myself to relax.

“…I’d appreciate that,” I said quietly.

Just one problem that was able to be helped… yet what felt like a million others still waiting for me.

“You should rest,” Myra said, clearly picking up on just how tired I was. “I imagine your trip here was probably not easy.”

“That would be an understatement,” I replied.

She nodded in understanding. “I’ll prepare you a room. Tomorrow, I can help you with your ability and answer any more questions you might have.”

And that was the last thing we discussed that day.

Before long, I found myself in a strange room, staring up at the ceiling as I waited for sleep to take me.

There had been so much information thrown at me, most of which was hard to digest. A lot of revelations and discoveries that I couldn’t make up even if I tried. A part of me still wasn’t sure if this was even real.