A weekend with the Alpha novel Chapter 56

I wanted to ask many questions, but I couldn't ask why he didn't tell me of his condition because we weren't even friends, to begin with. Last I checked, I hated him. The only thing that joined us was our son, and that wasn't enough reason to open himself up to me. Besides, there was nothing I would or could have done to help.

"I want to be alone." he said, "please leave."

"I can't," I said again, and I wanted to move at this point, but I didn't find the strength to do that.

He turned to me and I saw the wounded look in his eyes and it broke my heart to see it. "Aaron."

He shook his head, "Don't." he said before storming out.

My heart shrunk in my chest and my eyes grew glassy. This hurts much more than I thought, much more than I expected. I knew it wasn't my place and it would just get me into more trouble with him, but I wanted to be there for him. It felt right within me and leaving him alone, like he requested, didn't feel like something I could do.

I followed him outside. The day was less bright as compared to yesterday and the sky looked cloudy as if it would rain soon. I found him seated on the balcony with his face towards the open field to the left. The chilly breeze blew through his long hair and swayed it around on his face. The same breeze gripped my skin, causing goosebumps to erupt all over, and I wrapped my hands around my exposed arms.

He had sensed my presence because he spoke. "You shouldn't be out here, Zera, it's not healthy for you."

"I know," I answered, my lips trembling a little.

"And yet here you are."

It was the way it was. My heart was heavy, and I knew I wouldn't rest today or in the days to come if I didn't step up and did what needed to be done, said what needed to be said. "I am sorry."

He turned his head to the side but didn't turn fully to look at me. "Why? Are you saying that because you mean it or because you don't want to be the villain who wronged a dying man?"

"Both. But I am sorry because I didn't get it before. I do now and I have had a moment of self-reflection and I know what a horrible person I have been to you. I have also been a selfish mother to Zion and considered my feeling and insecurities above what was best for him. I denied him the years he could have had with a father who would have wanted him, years he would have been loved and cherished. Now he may not get the love he deserves because of me and I am sorry. I was mad when you wanted to take him away, but now I understand why. You're the better parent and I wronged you so badly and I need to say I'm sorry." a tear ran down my face.

He turned around and finally looked at me. "That must have been a hard thing to say out loud."

I drew a deep breath, "When I found out I was pregnant months later, I reached out to call you. I wanted to tell you our weekend together had brought forth a child, but some woman picked up the call and called you babe over the phone. I let my insecurities and heartache take over. I feared you would take him and cut me out of your lives and I did the cowardly act of hiding him from you. That's the truth in its entirety. I hope a day would come when you will forgive me for my shortcoming, Aaron Hart." he stayed silent, and I took my leave and went inside.

I didn't see or hear from Aaron the rest of the day, and I didn't expect to see him. He must have figured out I was the crazy one and chose to distance himself from me.

I deserved it. I was the villain, all the while I thought I was the victim, but sitting still and thinking everything through made me realise I pointed the fingers at the wrong person all those years.

I saw clearer now and coming out with the truth didn't make me less of a bad guy.

Sleep didn't come easy, a lot stayed on my mind. I had come out with the truth, which had weighed on me for the past five years, but I still didn't feel good.

I laid in bed with my mind fixed on the way forward and not long after that; I fell asleep.

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