Alpha alec's redemption (Sadie) novel Chapter 222

Nyx’s words keep playing in my mind like a broken record—sharp, bitter, and laced with so much hatred it felt like they cut right through my soul.

I’ve tried to make sense of them, but I still can’t. She said so little, yet somehow it felt like she revealed everything. I hated that she couldn’t just tell me everything I needed to know all at once. Why was she feeding me breadcrumbs? And what was that whole talk about me not being ready? How long was she going to use that as an excuse?

The more I thought about it, the more tangled everything became. The only clear takeaway from our conversation was that both she and Xena knew Kaden—and that Xena and Kaden did something awful to her. Something that caused her to hate her sister. Something that turned sister against sister.

I fell back in my chair, eyes unfocused, trying to piece it all together. There was something I was missing. Something crucial. What the hell was it?

Frustrated, I got up and started pacing. My feet moved aimlessly, but my thoughts scattered in every direction. I stomped like a child, letting out a groan of pure exasperation when, even after minutes of thinking, I still hadn’t found the missing piece.

Eventually, I collapsed into the chair again, head in hands. I closed my eyes and forced a deep breath in—then out—before opening them again.

Needing a distraction, I grabbed a book, hoping it would help reset my thoughts, maybe even lead me to something useful.

I don’t know how long I sat there flipping pages. But eventually, I shoved the book away in disgust. Nothing. No answers. Not even a hint to point me in the right direction.

I leaned back in the chair, staring at the ceiling as if the answers might suddenly appear there. Silence pressed in from all sides, thick and heavy. I hated this feeling—this helpless circling around a truth that always stayed just out of reach.

Maybe I was being played. Maybe Nyx was just messing with me, dangling half-truths and cryptic warnings because she could. Or maybe… maybe she was right. Maybe I wasn’t ready.

The thought unsettled me more than I wanted to admit. Because if I wasn’t ready now—after everything I’d been through—then when would I be?

I closed my eyes again, but this time I wasn’t trying to breathe or center myself. I was reaching—mentally clawing through every memory, every word, every silence. Nyx had said something. Something about betrayal. About being abandoned. And she spoke Kaden’s name with venom, but Xena’s with something colder. Emptier.

Like the hate had burned itself out and left only ash.

And then it hit me. Not a full picture, but a crack in the frame—something terrible must have happened between the three of them. Something that twisted their loyalties and buried their love under layers of guilt, rage, and silence.

I sat up straighter, heart pounding now—not with fear, but with the edge of understanding. I still didn’t have the full truth, but I was close. Closer than before.

Nyx didn’t want to feed me crumbs. Maybe she wanted me to dig.