BASHing Trinity novel Chapter 17

BASH

Damn if it doesn't hurt being rejected. Being rejected by someone you love and you thought she has feelings for you. I feel so embarrassed, and I need to run away from her. I can't even face her.

I sit on a stone plate in front of a small pond. The wind is chilly, but I don't want to get inside the house, yet. I'm still upset. I frown and look down the water, and I see my reflection--a very sad Bash. I also see the crescent silver moon. I place my hand on my chin, leaning my elbows on my knees. I lift my chin up and just amazed at the night sky with uncountable twinkling stars above me.

I always think about her whenever I saw the sky full of stars. That's how fascinated I am with Trinity. Those freckles on her face are like stars twinkling on her face.

She's also like the sky--she seems near, yet she's so far. But even the sky is still reachable, right? I'm not losing hope, especially now that we shared precious moments.

"Bash!" My big sister squeals over the phone.

"Hey, Lizzy. Am I disturbing you?" I ask with uncertainty.

"Baby Bash, you sound so miserable. What's wrong?"

I sigh deeply, looking down the small pond again. "She doesn't want me, Lizzy. I thought she has feelings for me, but I was so wrong." I can't help but run my fingers through my hair out of frustration. My stomach twists at the thought of Trinity doesn't feel the same towards me.

"You're not wrong, Bash. K loves you."

My heartbeat skips a bit at Lizzy's words. I hope she's right, but I know that Trinity still loves her dead fiance.

I frown again. "Maybe she loves me, Lizzy, but nothing more than just a friend. I thought she has feelings for me. The way she looks at me, it seems there. The way she kisses me, the way we made--" I stop abruptly.

Lizzy squeals. "W-what? Say that again?"

I have to pull the phone away from my ear. I wince. Is Lizzy going to damage my eardrum?

"Bash!" I can still hear the faintest squeals of my sister even if the phone is away from my ear.

Lizzy knows my secrets. She's the one who encourages me to make a move, and it's been years that I kept my feelings from Trinity. Now that I man up that's the time Trinity turns me down. My shoulders sag at the thought of it.

"Bash, are you still there? Young man, answer me, or I will come and let you talk to me face to face."

I roll my eyes. "You don't have to threaten me, Lizzy, and I'm way bigger and taller than you." I snort and amused at her threat.

"So, what had gone wrong, Baby Bash?" She sounds serious again.

"I told her I want her to be my girlfriend." My heart aches. I want Mom's hug at this moment. I've never been felt so alone and helpless.

"Then what did she say?"

I purse my lips, sighing deeply. I open my mouth, but Lizzy cut me off.

"Did she say she's not ready?"

I shake my head even it's impossible for her to see me. "No, Lizzy. She said no." I close my eyes shut, rubbing my face.

"Oh, Bash. I'm so sorry to hear that. Did she even tell you why?"

"No, Lizzy. And neither did I ask why. It's cleared to me that I'm only her friend. Nothing more."

"Bash, it's not too late, and don't lose hope. She must be shocked or surprised, or maybe you should wait until both of you come back. At that time, she can think clearly without sex involved." She sighs.

"I will not give up on her, Lizzy. Not now, now that we shared something special. The sex was beyond amazing. I never felt like that before with anyone." I hear Lizzy giggles.

I know it sounds awkward to tell my sister about my sex life, especially sex with our best friend, but I'm not ashamed because I love Trinity so much.

"I know it would be amazing, Bash. I knew it! I knew it!"

I chuckle. I know she's maybe jumping for joy.

"Then what's wrong?"

"I ask her to be mine," I answer quickly.

The line goes silent. I check my phone screen, but it's not disconnected. "Lizzy? Are you still there?"

She groans louder and roars. "What did you just say, Sebastian Hughes IV?"

"I said be mine?" I answer, seem doubtful. "Why?"

"And why did you effing say that? Can't you even say properly, would you be my girlfriend? Or I wanna take you out on a proper date? Ugh! I want to strangle you right now."

"What's wrong—"

"Do you want her to be your pet, a belonging, or a thing, Bash? It's your Trinity we're talking about, dumbass!"

My brow furrows. "What do you mean by a pet, a thing, Lizzy?"

"Well, she's not an animal, or your property, idiot!"

I can feel her rolling her eyes. "I can't understand you, Lizzy!" I snap, and I'm getting annoyed.

"Because you're a dumb, baby brother!" she answers almost immediately.

"Talk to me, Lizzy. I need your help, pretty freaking bad."

"Apologize and tell her that you don't mean like that, and you want her to be your girlfriend. She's not an animal to you to be your pet, does she? or a thing for you to own, Bash, and she's my best friend. Snd if she's hurt you're hurting me too. Be a man, and act like a man, get that?"

"Yeah, I got it," I blow a breath.

What's wrong with be mine? Like, be mine? Be my girlfriend. Women are so annoying and weird. Sometimes.

The weather is getting chilly outside. I get inside the hanok. The floor squeaks every time I take a step. I walk directly to our bedroom. Only the lamp from the small nightstand gives light to the room.

Trinity is already sleeping facing her side. Shrugging all my clothes off to the floor, I leave just a pair of boxers. I lie down slowly beside her to avoid waking her up. I know she's grumpy when she wakes up without getting enough sleep.

I slip myself inside the blanket we're sharing, then I flick the lights off. She stirs, and I stiffen. I'm afraid that she might kick me out of the room for good, and I don't want to sleep outside alone while she's just a wall away.

"Bash, is that you?" she asks in a groggy voice.