Chapter 0126
Ava.
I’m clearing the house. A thorough cleaning just to keep my mind off things. I’m still coming to terms
with the fact that I’m pregnant.
When Rowan rejected the idea of us having another baby. I all but gave up on giving Noah a sibling. Now!
have another baby on the way and I didn’t know how to feel.
My phone rings and I pick it up. Normally I would have refused to pick up, but not today. Pushing those
close to me away wasn’t doing me any good…
“Hi Letty” I murmur while sitting down.
I’ve been so tired of late. I should have known that there was something more to it.
“Oh my God. You picked up. I thought you wouldn’t” she screams through the phone before sniffing. “I
missed hearing your voice. It’s been weeks”
“I’m sorry.” I release a breath. “I just didn’t know how to handle everything so I pushed you away”
I’ve never been good at communicating my feelings. I’ve never been good at even acknowledging them.
When I’m stressed or over emotional, I shut down. I try to bury them so that I can function properly.
Pushing my emotions down is usually better than acknowledging them. Now I know that isn’t healthy at
all
“Are you okay now?”
“Not all the way, but I will be” I assure her.
I don’t know how I plan to do that, but I was going to come out of this stronger.
I still can’t believe that I thought of killing myself and my own child. I may not know how to feel, but this
baby was my blood. Just like Noah is. I plan to be a good mother. I plan to be the best mother to him or
her.
I shake those thoughts away. I don’t want to think of how low I had hit. I don’t want to think of what I
almost did.
“I’m pregnant” I whisper, when she doesn’t say anything after a while.
“What?” She shrieks in surprise. “When did you find out?”
“About a week ago”
11/1
time.” She takes a deep breath as emotions clogs her voice.
me” I was close to tears.
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