Lost in You novel Chapter 51

James, shouldn’t you hate me? Why are you so good to me? why?

I hurt you again and again, but you?

I have more and more debts, what should I do?

The moment I hang up the phone, I immediately stop crying, and I think I would never cry again.

"What kind of expression? I can’t see it through" Neil sneers, "Are you moved? He can help you pay, and I'm also paying you money. Why don't you show me such an expression?"

"Oh, you cry for another man in the face of your husband. Don’t you feel ashamed?" Neil pinches my chin, his eyes fierce, "Carolina, you are my wife now. You have to make it clear! Don't you know how much I paid for your father?”

"Who am I crying for? I just love James, I just don't love you!"

"Okay, it's great! But Carolina, you have signed an agreement with me. You can only be my wife this life!

Yeah, I signed the damn agreement! But James and I have no chance.

I'm too different from him, I can only become his burden, the point is that I can't let my family be worse because of me.

Therefore, I can only admit my fate, and I will not see James in the future, he can only become my memory.

He will stay with another woman in the future. Can I also have a place in his heart?

I don't know. I think about it, and the more I think about it, the more I feel hurt.

"There will be a trial tomorrow." Mom comes back, nervously, "I don't know if your father will go in for a few years, he is too old to stand the publishment."

The atmosphere in the ward is very depressing, and everyone is worried. There are too many things happening recently.

Even if my body is weak, I still can't sleep.

Mother leaves early and goes to the court.

I can only wait for the news here.

As time passes by, I become more and more disturbed. I don't know what kind of ending Dad would get.

Finally, my mother's phone call comes, "Just sentenced, your father will go for a few years."

Fortunately, it is only a few years, not a lifetime.

I don't know if I should be happy or sad.

Mother goes home to pack up dad’s clothes, and she doesn't cry or make a noise all at once. She is silent and quiet.

My mother says, "I never think that I could be separated from your father for so long. I never even think about how would I life my life if you father leaves my world."

I know that my father and mother love each other so much, but I don't expect it to be so much.

I don't know how to comfort my mother. I also know the feeling of loss, and the kind of helplessness and panic. All I can do is to hold my mother’s hand and say, “Everything will pass.”

"We didn’t use for Neil's money. If you can leave Neil, you should leave him. We owe him the money. We will pay it back slowly. I don't want to delay you for a lifetime." My mother smiles weakly at me and takes things away. "I'll see your dad."

James and I have no way to be together.

I am the one who is unforgivable!

As time goes by, I am finally able to get out of bed and walk around, holding the wall for a while every day. The feeling of being able to walk down gives me a feeling of being alive again.

But mother becomes more and more silent.

"Today we can go out." The nurse comes over and helps me get out of bed.

I haven't been exposed to the outside air and sunlight for a long time, and I'm already a little excited.

I walk anxiously, limping out.

"The sun is so good today," says the little nurse, "It's also good for you to go out and walk. It's nice to bask in the sun."

I can't open my eyes because of the light, which makes me feel like I'm in an isolated world.

I do not expect to come out again, I have experienced life and death.

In the distance, an ambulance roar by, and the nurse helps me to stand aside quickly.

"I don't know what happened. Every day's emergency department is busy." The little nurse mutters. She says that her boyfriend is in an emergency department. Although they all work in a hospital, they don't even have time to meet.

I see her complaint, but she smiles at the corner of her mouth, and it is sweet.

The ambulance stops at the door of the hospital, and I stare curiously until the patient is withdrawn from the ambulance.

He is lying on the bed with blood on the corners of his mouth and his chest. He’s lifeless.

Why did he become so haggard? Why!

"Quickly! Go away!" The medical staff pushes him past me in a hurry.

It is James, what's wrong with him?

I keep up with it unconsciously, and the little nurse wonders, "What's wrong with you?"

"I'm going to see!" I walk forward, staggering, and the nurse immediately supports me, "Be careful, don't fall!"

Why did he lose so much weight? Why is the corner of the mouth full of blood? Why is he sent to the hospital for emergency?

Why? James, did you take good care of yourself?

I am a sinner. I am anxious and I want to run, but my body is disobedient. The more anxious I am, the slower I am. The nurse can't help me. I fall to the ground.