Mafia Vengeance novel Chapter 43

This heavy feeling was non other than guilt.

This guilt was making it difficult for him to breath. He needs to take it off. He wants to get rid of it. And for that he needs her forgiveness. He very well knew the gravity of his crime. He knew she will never forgive him neither he expected anything. But he wants to get these feelings off of him.

He knew she was on sedatives, and she won't be waking up soon, so he went to her room. When, his eyes landed on her small frame he felt his heart paining badly in his chest. She was lying there still with bruises, marks, chapped lips and pale skin. An IV was attached to her arm. She was this much still, that a person can't even tell if she was breathing or not. The beeping of the machine which show her heart rate was the only thing which indicated that she was alive.

Slowly he made his way towards her and sat beside the bed on the chair. He saw her small pale hand and wanted to hold it,he hesitated a bit but held her hand it was so cold, his own hands were shaking he slowly started to rub her hand to make her warm. And gently kissed on her hand.

Her bruised face was making it difficult for him to breath when he knew he's the reason behind it. A tear slipped down his eye and his whole body started shaking in pain and agony.

"I-I'm sorry Chloe."

He muttered while another tear roles down his eyes. His hold on her hand tightened in a gentle manner as his body shook in pure guilt and regret. He gave feathery kisses on her palm as if he'll apply a bit pressure she'll break. In a broken voice he spoke. "I-I----"

"I-I n-never wanted to hurt you. I won't clarify myself because I know I'm at fault here. I wronged you."

He paused a bit and kissed her palm gently and continued. "B-but I'm a selfish bastard. I want your f-forgiveness, I can't b-breath properly knowing that I'm your sinner."

He wiped his tears and continued in a hoarse voice.

"I love y-you Chloe. And I don't know since when."

He gently placed her hand on his heart, a tear slipped down his dark orbs as he continued.

"This is paining Chloe and its unbearable. It's as if someone is squeezing it painfully inside me and is tearing it apart bit by bit just by knowing that you will hate me. T-this pain is making me vulnerable."

At this moment he remembered her words she had said the same thing to him with the same gestures when she was drunk. He could feel her pain. His tears turn into low sobs.

"I-I'm sorry please, I can't see you like this please forgive me Chloe, forgive m-me I beg you!"

His body shook and racked with sobs, he couldn't stand seeing her life less like this anymore. He kissed her palm last time, his lips lingering there a bit longer and with a last glance at her he left the room.

Ethan was already depressed with all the situation but after hearing about Chloe's mutism he was scared to accept this reality. He didn't know what to feel anymore.

And about convincing Andrew for letting Chloe go was never an option because he knew very well that Andrew won't ever let this happen.

Ethan himself would never consider this option, as much as he wanted to take Chloe away from this hell, he couldn't because he knew how much dangerous it could get for Chloe.

After knowing how their enemies had drugged Andrew and are looking for a chance to pounce on them again he couldn't stop himself from worrying. After confronting Shawn he was well aware of John's motives.

When he was confirmed with the tests that Andrew was drugged, at that time he didn't know either to be relieved or to be more angry. Either way it was a loss or loss situation for them. He didn't know that it would be better for him to tell Chloe about Andrew being drugged or not. But he knew very well that she wouldn't consider it in the first place.

After her first panic attack Ethan distant himself from her he was afraid that she might hallucinate Andrew in him. That's why he never visited her room and only watched her from distance. The way she would look, sitting like a life less soul hurts him so much. As there is only one expression on her face every time ... Lost!

In the house everyone's life is disturbed. Jess and Eli would try their best to approach Chloe or talk to her but she would just simply stare in the space and didn't even consider their presence. Every one was sad.

But the one who broke his precious love, was himself completely broken.