Returning from the Dead: His Secret Lover novel Chapter 1873

“Oh, come on it was a joke Richards!” Hayes shouts to me as I get out of the pool.

“Fine, we’re going in the Jacuzzi!” Rochelle says.

Jeff follows behind me.

“Leave me alone Jeff!” I yell.

“Alex! Alex, slow down.” Jeff rushes after me.

When I can no longer walk, I cover my face. He picks at my fingers, until our eyes meet.

I hate that I’m like this. I hate that things get to me, like this.

“Alex are you okay?” He asks.

I shake my head, at the trigger words.

“I can’t breathe. I think I’m having a panic attack.” I say.

I’m pacing the living room, every few seconds I stop to catch my breath.

Everything was too close, everything was too loud. My heart is rac-ing. The air is disappearing.

“Alex. What do I do?” Jeff stutters.

I can’t speak.

Jeff shouts my name, I jump, I’m scared. I am crying now.

Jeff gives me a hug. My face is against his bare chest.

“Thank you.” I say.

He nods his head, and we both stare at each other. Tears still fall down my cheek when I kiss Jeff again.

This time I wanted to stop my thoughts. More importantly, I want-ed Jeff to want me.

We both walk over to the couch, and I climb on top of him, pressing both my lips, and body against his.

I feel Jeff’s tongue collide with mine. I’m gliding my tongue against his still wet bottom lip. Jeff holds my upper back, then goes lower and lower until he reaches my waist. I kiss his neck and comb his hair with my hands.

Jeff calls my name, but I ignore him.

I want to feel so into Jeff, as if I’m in a trance. I’m just forcing it though. I go for Jeff’s shorts, but he grabs my hands, and interlaces them with his.

He calls me again, almost offended. I’m still pressed against him.

“What?” I ask.

“Yeah, I’m not doing this.” He says.

He lets go of my hands.