There's No Love In the Deathzone (BL) novel Chapter 176

Chapter 176: Chapter 170. Going Concern

"The measurement shows that it’s a high red," Radia explained, as the screen showed them a swirling gate in red so deep it looked like coagulated blood.

"Might as well call it a low black at this point," Kei, who acted as the scout, commented as she read the chart from the report sent into their commlink.

"Which is why you’re all being called back," Radia said. "We’re rather sensitive about dungeon anomaly nowadays, so anything remotely close to a black gate is being treated on high alert."

The dungeon itself, thankfully, was located outside the residential area. It was on a mountain a few kilometers away from the west gate, and the government had sealed the entire mountain for it.

"There’d be no official broadcasting to prevent any mishaps..."

"Oh, thank God!"

"...but some sneaky paparazzi might still lurk around,"

Sounds of whines could be heard then. But they immediately quiet again when Radia clapped his hand and the briefing continued.

"You just came back, so I’ll give you two days to get situated and cleaned, and I expect the guides to be at their peak capacity,"

"Yes, Sir!"

Radia stood up then, throwing the briefing file to Bassena before walking out. "On me, Luzein."

Wordlessly, Zein proceeded to follow the Guildmaster under everybody’s stares. Like a reflex, Bassena stood up too, and Han Shin, who was upset that he was getting left behind all the time, followed.

"Not you," Radia threw a warning glance at the two espers, who looked at him as if they just faced a huge betrayal.

But Zein was thankful for that, because he knew what Radia wanted to talk to him about, and he didn’t really want those two to see any of his expressions that might slip up later during the conversation.

With the summoned phantom trailing behind them, Zein followed Radia to the elevator, where they headed directly to the top floor. It was quiet as they climb, but Zein could feel Radia’s piercing stare through the reflection on the elevator’s wall.

"Is it on purpose, or something you’re done impulsively?" Radia finally asked before the elevator stopped on the highest floor.

"I’ve been planning it since last week," Zein replied calmly. "Or did you miss the memo?"

The esper, unexpectedly, laughed. A short laugh that sounded more cynical than joyful. "I thought you were more cautious than this, Luzein," the elevator made a sound before stopping, and the door hissed open. "You should know it’s never a good thing interacting with miasma when you’re not in a good mental state."

"Who said I’m not in a good--"

Zein stopped as Radia turned his face and gave him a sharp gaze. It was a face that wordlessly challenged him to lie, if he could. Unfortunately, Zein wasn’t foolish enough to attempt it.

"Right," Radia only shifted his gaze after Zein visibly sighed, and then proceeded to walk out of the elevator. "Let me quote your report--’the core attacks soul space’. You’re not going to tell me you made that conclusion without experiencing it yourself, are you?"

"No..."

"You know why I’m telling those two not to come along, don’t you?"

Zein did not reply, which in itself was an answer, and they continued to walk in silence. He never felt it before, but the hallway to the Guildmaster’s room felt unnecessarily long somehow, perhaps because they had to pass a certain door, and Zein kept his eyes trained on the front and the floor all the while. The way he reflexively averted his eyes from Bassena’s office door surprised him more than anyone else.

And Radia, being him, must have realized that. The man said nothing though; not until they arrived in his office and turned around to stare at Zein. After what felt like a long time, and preceded by a soft sigh, Radia finally spoke.

"Do you need help?"

Did he? Zein chewed the inside of his cheek. "I...don’t think I can tell anyone about this,"

For anyone to be able to help him, they need to know what his baggage was, what made his mind so messed up. What did they attack in his head. And he couldn’t do it without divulging a world-changing secret. The only person who knew about what transpired, and the one Zein didn’t mind appearing vulnerable with was Bassena.

But that option...was no longer available.

He could talk to Radia, but...

No--it would be different. Radia knew everything, but they would talk about it in a logical way, and Zein realized he did not seek logic in this.

Because he knew--he knew what messed him up. He knew everything was just his dark mind playing the worst possible thought ever swirling in his mind. He knew everything was just an illusion, yet he still couldn’t get it out of his mind.

What blight him right now wouldn’t go away by simply saying ’No, it’s not true, it’s all in your head’ because he knew! He knew it all just in his head. He didn’t want to be like this also, but he just couldn’t help it.