There's No Love In the Deathzone (BL) novel Chapter 459

Chapter 459: Chapter 452. A Running Stream

On the day of their departure, people woke up early from being nervous. But on the first morning in the Deathzone, Zein found out most people were still asleep when he woke up. Perhaps because they were fighting and moving non-stop yesterday, or perhaps because morning or night didn’t have any difference under the dark cloud hindering the sky.

The only people he could see in the camp were the ones on breakfast duty--Kei--and Ron, who had used to live in the grey and black of this part of the world.

Normally, there would be people on night shift duty, but Bassena took it upon himself to be the first guardian, since he knew the others still needed some adjustment to the Deathzone. The man was probably having a walk around the camp, or checking the route they would take today.

Speaking about the route...

"When did you look for it?" Zein asked Ron first thing, not even with a good morning. "The route."

"The Captain made a team sometime in January--you know, after that guildmaster of yours sent a bunch of new equipment," Ron curled his lips. "It’s not like we’re lacking suicidal bastards. We just didn’t have adequate equipment to make it worth the effort before."

"Oh, so the bribe works," Zein smirked, and Ron chuckled while handing him a cup of steaming hot coffee from the batch that Kei had just made.

The scout looked at Zein with a slightly wider smile as the scent of coffee mingled between them. The last time he saw Zein, the guide wouldn’t even open his mask unless it was during mealtime. But now, Zein only wore his mask when it was necessary--when they stepped into the Deathzone. Just like any other guide. And the cheeky commentary...

"A lot of things must have happened during this one year," he said carefully, leaning against his hand as he continued to stare at the guide. "I don’t think this change happened just because you fell in love with an esper."

Zein smiled subtly. "Have I changed a lot?"

"Just seeing you not wearing your mask constantly already spells change, isn’t it?"

"Anything more?"

"You talk more," Ron sipped his coffee and watched the smiling guide in front of him. "You talk softer, and...your eyes--yeah, your eyes are different. Brighter? Or should I say more alive?"

Zein recalled the time Agni called him to the Captain’s office, how the berserker said he had the eyes of the people who had been here for years. Numb eyes that had already given up on living under the bright sky. Naturally, Zein had no idea what was different with his eyes, since he rarely looked into a mirror, even to this day.

But he knew enough that he had changed.

"You’re right, a lot of things happened," Zein leaned back and dropped a few cubes of sugar inside his steaming coffee. This too, was something he never thought of doing last year. "Honestly," he chuckled, looking at the scout again. "Honestly, I didn’t think things would change if I went up. I just did it because you told me to, and to see what this Deathzone project was about."

That was very much Zein; Ron smiled. "But?"

"But I found a lot of things," Zein smiled, sipping on his sweet coffee. "I found my family. I found my parents. Their remains, I mean."

Ron raised his brows. He did read about how Zein was actually the heir of House Ishtera--from the newspaper the logistic truck driver brought every month--but there was nothing about that in there. If he recalled correctly, shouldn’t Zein’s parents have died around his birth? To think he could still find them...

"I managed to unite them," Zein added with a blissful smile that Ron had never seen before. "It was...the proudest I ever felt about myself."

"A deserved feeling," Ron smiled bitterly. He too, would like for his parents to be together if he could. But alas--no remains would be retrievable in the Deathzone.

"I found myself," Zein tapped on his mug, staring at the sweet dark liquid inside that reminded him of someone. "I found something that I want to do," he said. "Not exactly what I want to do my entire life, but at least...what I want to do now."

At the very least, when he saw his brothers the last time, he could say that he was living his life; the life that he wanted. Perhaps it was also being pushed by situations, but whether it was about the Deathzone, or about Bassena, he didn’t feel like he was forced to do it.

"That’s good," Ron let out a sigh. "I was feeling rather guilty sometimes."

"Why?"

The scout glanced at Zein with a wry smile. "Every time I read about you, it seems like you’re always entangled in something. I was worried that we push you out just to throw you into a snake den or something."

Zein chuckled and recalled everything that happened again. He never bothered about what the media was talking about him, but he could guess what kind of story they liked to write. The more scandalous or tragic it was, the more the public liked it.

"Well...there were a lot of problems, definitely," Zein nodded and drank his coffee again, savoring the bitter-sweet taste. "But it was all necessary, I think. I always gained something in the end."

"Oh, you even become philosophical now?" Ron laughed.

Zein scoffed and just drank his coffee again. "Well, I’m also thinking about the future now, so..."

Ron’s laugh got higher. "Heh--is that why you take off your mask now?"

He recalled what Agni said to him the day before yesterday, after a brief meeting with Zein during the guide’s first appearance. He’s no longer stagnant, the Captain said. Just by looking into the guide’s eyes.