There's No Love In the Deathzone (BL) novel Chapter 611

Chapter 611: Chapter 605. Pulsing Rope

The first thing Bassena did after emerging from the white snake was listen to Zein’s heartbeat.

It’s there; he thought with relief. That relief persisted until he moved Zein to the Sanctuary and Han Shin told him the guide was in good condition. Then came the dread.

Staring at the unconscious Zein, Bassena could feel something different when he touched the guide’s pulse. The feeling of sensing his own pulse while listening to another’s was newly exhilarating and...scary.

It should be a beautiful moment and a blissful sensation, but all he could feel was a hot lump in his chest.

Because the way it was made...wasn’t beautiful.

At that moment, when Bassena looked at the widened blue eyes from the door, that intertwining relief and dread churned inside him again.

"I’m...sorry..." with cold nape, Bassena cowardly lowered his head.

He couldn’t. He couldn’t see those eyes. Those eyes would incite longing and affection, beckoning for indulgence in grasping the thread of fate, but he shouldn’t. It wasn’t something he received--it was something he snatched away.

"I...I couldn’t think of any other way," Bassena clenched his fists, cursing himself for trying to make an excuse. "My blessing...it only worked for me, but...it was something He gave me to keep me alive."

As someone who reached the highest floor at such a young age, Ophiucus favored Bassena greatly as a talent the world should not lose. The deity, who was a healer more than a warrior, bestowed the blessing to keep the rare talent alive as long as possible.

And so, Bassena did a gamble.

"I thought that if we were bonded, I’d die if you die, so...I was betting on the fact that He wanted to keep me alive," Bassena continued.

He had to use both of his scales for that--the only two chances left. But so what? At that moment, Bassena only thought of keeping Zein alive. He thought it would be fine even if the guide hated him because of that.

He thought.

But when he was facing that possibility for real, his heart was wavering. His tenacity crumbled into dust. Could he really? Could he really do what Han Joon did and leave Zein’s side?

"I’m sorry..." he grasped his throbbing forehead and covered his blurry vision. "I’m sorry to force this on you..."

Bassena knew they had a promise to make this bond after the mission, but he also knew Zein used to hate the idea of imprint. He witnessed the kind of face Zein made when he knew his parents underwent a forced imprint. He knew the hatred in the guide’s voice when he talked about the miserable life of the guide in an unconsented imprint.

So what if they had a promise before? That willingness could be shattered with just one forceful act.

And that possibility was the source of Bassena’s dread.

"I’m sorry, I’m sorry," the anxiety that had been piling up inside of him for days spilled out as he wobbled and slid pathetically to the floor. "I’m...you can...I will sever it if you want, just..."

The moment an imprinted esper and guide sever their bond, they would never be able to redo it, and the esper would never be able to receive that guide’s guiding. But even so...

I don’t like being tied. I don’t like being trapped

Bassena remembered what the guide had said in the past, and he couldn’t bear trapping Zein inside a bond he didn’t want. The same way he couldn’t bear to be away from the guide.

"...just let me stay by your side," Bassena pleaded. He was already on the floor anyway. "Even if you sever the bond, just...just let me stay, please..." he would kneel, he would beg, he would do anything. "Please..."

He was so desperate and anxious in his plea that he couldn’t even hear the approaching footsteps until Zein grasped his hair and made him face forward. Through blurry eyes filled with tears, Bassena saw a pair of shaking blue eyes and trembling lips.

"Ze--"

"My esper..."

A sweet voice, far from hatred. A gentle caress on his trembling cheeks, and a regretful stroke on three dull scales under his eyes. At that moment, Bassena saw nothing but affection in those blue eyes. A simple, yet powerful affection.

"My esper," Zein stroked the messy platinum hair and whispered against the esper’s trembling lips. His esper. The man who shook his heart and soul just with a presence.

He remembered his heartfelt plea when he saw this face at the edge of his life.

I want to live. I want to live with him in the future we drew and fought together.

That plea, with the strong pulse flowing in both of their life, had been fulfilled.

Guiding Bassena’s trembling hands to his face as he pressed his forehead against Bassena’s, Zein whispered again, in a voice like a hymn.

"My esper."

Because it was, after all, a blissful blessing.

Holding his guide tightly in his arms, Bassena let go of his dread and anxiety through a torrent of tears.