There's No Love In the Deathzone (BL) novel Chapter 684

Chapter 684: Side Story 3. Stellar Blossom - 19

Red.

Red was his world. His color. The color of his whole world.

He could live with nothing but red; the red belonged to his beloved darling. He could live seeing nothing else in the world as long as he could still see his darling. The red that changed his entire life. His entire world.

He could live within the chilling cold gnawing at his bone. He could live with screaming muscles and numbed nerves. He could live with searing pain all over his skin.

But this? Losing his red?

He couldn’t live with this.

For the first time in his life, as red was robbed from him, he crumbled. He couldn’t keep himself together enough before tears fell from his shaking eyes. Eyes that were no longer useful to him.

His fingers twitched, and his hand raised to his face before he realized it, as if wanting to gauge the useless eyes out.

"Joon!"

The shout snapped him out of it, but the force behind his movement still lingered. Instead of his face, Han Joon swung his hand to the side, shattering the reinforced window. His eyes, unblinking, glared at the black marble floor as Radia rushed toward him.

By the time Radia arrived in front of him, Han Joon had already slid to the floor, blood dripping from his hands and the window. Radia held the trembling, bloody hand with shattered glass all over it, summoning a green-cloaked figure.

"Heal him!"

The figure flinched at the agitated order and glanced at the wound, frowning. What the hell--the summoner made it seem like it was a life-threatening incident, but...

"It’s just a scratch, damn," the figure grumbled--but a vibrating dagger in the black-suited butler made him shudder. "Ugh--I know, I know."

With a simple hand wave, the shards moved back to the window, the blood flew back inside the wound, and the incisions closed up. As if everything was a lie, the injury and the damage vanished.

If only...if only he could turn back time further. Not just a few minutes. But not even Bassena Vaski had enough mana to sustain fifteen years...no, thirty-five years of time manipulation.

He held the hand, which was still trembling despite the healing. Wouldn’t it be good if time turning could also heal the invisible wound in one’s heart and mind?

"J-Joon..." Radia grabbed the trembling hand tightly when he failed to catch any answer. The lowered head was unmoving, and Radia felt his heart lurching to his stomach. "Joon!"

"Haa...haa..."

Radia bit his lips and careened his head to look at the bowed face, watching the unblinking, shaking eyes with a broken heart. "Joon...darling?"

He stroked the trembling cheek, but there was still no answer. All he could hear was the heavy breath of a man whose nightmare had turned into reality.

When he saw Joon look at him with widened, shocked eyes the moment he woke up, before immediately scrambling to the window, staring unblinkingly at the autumn foliage...Radia knew he lost another color. The one most important to him.

Radia’s color.

And how could his heart not break, seeing his ever-strong husband crumble that way? Radia held the newly healed hand and, after taking another one, pulled both toward his face. He felt the cool fingers twitch and waited until Joon raised his face.

"Can you not see me?"

The black eyes shook once more. "I...can...but--"

"Am I no longer your darling without my color?" Radia held back the boiling lump in his throat, shoving it down to his stomach. He couldn’t fall. When his pillar was crumbling, he had to be the one who stayed strong. "Am I not lovely anymore?"

"Don’t talk nonsense!" Han Joon snapped, grasping his darling’s face tight.

Radia smiled, despite the needles stabbing his heart. Gently, he held the anxious face in front of him and planted soft, soothing kisses. It was the first time he felt Han Joon trembling this much, and his heart shattered with every choked breath that the man restrained from making.

When his lips pressed softly on the closed eyelid, a pair of slightly cool arms held his back, pulling him into a tight embrace. Gradually, the trembling lessened and ceased with a deep breath as Radia stroked the black hair.

"It’s okay," he whispered gently, leaning against the older’s. "We’ll get you new glasses, yeah? It will be okay with that, right?"

Radia raised his head and pulled back so he could see his husband’s face. It was the messiest he had ever seen Han Joon, and while it saddened him, the purity of it brought a smile to his lips.

"Just a few more months," he stroked the wet cheeks, stroking the trace of tears with his thumbs. "I found a tip about a soul flame artifact in the Western Republic--Jock is already there to look for it. And Shin...he’ll come out in the winter, so..." he smiled and kissed the pale lips softly. "Just bear with it for a few months, yeah?"

The kiss warmed Joon’s lips gradually, enough for him to speak more calmly.

"Yeah," he nodded. "Okay," he laid his head on his darling’s chest. "I’m sorry, darling."

"No, no--don’t apologize!" Radia cradled his husband and stroked the black hair, whispering desperately. "Don’t..."

He knew how hard it was. If it was hard for him, how much harder would it be for Joon? But he had been taking it gracefully all this time, so what with a little show of loose emotions?

"We’ll be fine," Radia lifted his husband’s face. "Right--"

He smiled--a sweet smile that put Han Joon in a daze.

Yeah, we’ll be fine. We have to be.