Konstantin: The Heartless Beta novel Chapter 42

Lily

I don’t think I had ever felt the peace that settled in my heart when I opened my eyes and saw Konstantin lying next to me. After everything I went through at the hands of Stefan, he still saw me as his mate and had to rescue me. I know I’m tainted goods, but the look in Konstantin’s eyes when he sees me says different.

To think, only a few hours prior, I was ready to die alongside my child; now, both of us have been given a second chance. I’m not letting anything happen to my children or me, not after what I have been through.

Konstantin stirs and breathes out a sigh. I don’t know why, but this little action makes me smile, so I draw my hand to his face and cup his cheek. How am I so lucky to be here again? Laying next to my mate and our children feels like I have died and gone to heaven. Or perhaps I am still chained up in Stefan’s dungeon, and this is all a dream?

I wouldn’t put that cruelty past someone like him.

“Hey, why are you crying?” I snap out of my thoughts when I hear Konstantin’s voice and blink. Tears ran down my face, tears I didn’t even know I was busy shedding.

“I…I don’t know. Laying next to you just feels so… surreal, I guess? I can’t help but wonder if this isn’t all a dream Stefan is making me suffer, and when I wake up again, you’ll be gone, and I’ll be back on those chains.” I say with a sad smile on my face.

Konstantin gets up, walks around to my side of the bed, and sits down, then he pulls me out of bed and plants me on his lap with my legs on either side of him.

“Lily,” he starts, wrapping his arms tightly around my waist. “This is all real; rest assured. I am never letting you out of my sight again, not after I lost you in the cruellest way.”

He cups my face in both of his hands when I start to sob and makes me look at him. “This is real, you’re here with our children and me, and I love all of you so much that I would kill anyone who would dare touch you with the intention of doing you harm. You’re mine, you’re my mate, and I love you so fucking much.”

When I nod, he looks intently into my eyes and draws his face closer to mine, wrapping his hands in my hair at the back of my head. Our lips meet, and everything else falls away, every doubt that this could be real, every misunderstanding and feeling of being a tainted soul.

Konstantin’s tongue traces mine, and I can taste the remnants of whiskey, our kiss starting soft but increasing in intensity when I can feel myself scenting him. This… has never happened before because I am scentless, and my heartbeat quickens when he scents me as well. He pulls me closer to him, digging his hands into my hips, and I can feel the outline of his cock against my sex.

“Lily,” he whispers through our frenzied kiss, and this is when I realise that we haven’t kissed since he claimed me in the woods behind this estate. This is a pent up of emotions, of want and need and knowing we had one another all that time, but neither of us chose to take the first step until it was too late.

Then he breaks off the kiss so abruptly that I open my eyes and blink a few times - then I feel that pull in my chest when I look at him.

“As much as I would love to bury myself to the fucking hilt inside of you, I won’t right now. You’ve been through a lot, especially with that asshole demon and giving birth a few hours ago.”

He holds up his hand as I am about to protest and gives me a sad smile. “I know you’re going to say that you’ve healed, but that’s not what I mean. You need time, Lily and I will not be the one to take advantage of your need to be held right now.”

I didn’t want to cry. I didn’t want to admit to him or myself that I needed time or that I felt weak and abused; not after he trained me to be stronger than I am.

But the tears falling down my face right now proves that this is just what I needed to hear from someone. I am weak. I was taken advantage of and abused - and I am fucking angry.

The soft crying eventually turns to heart-wrenching sobs, but all I feel is Konstantin’s arms around me as he comforts me with his soft words.

I’m strong, I am a warrior… but I got taken advantage of when I was weak and turned into a sex slave for a demon who only cared about producing some sort of demonic spawn. He drew me to him by using the demonic side of me that I didn’t know existed and kept me chained up.

After years of fighting in Fenriz’s rings, to Konstantin building up my self worth as his second in command and then being reduced to a demonic sex slave. Yes, I am fucking angry, but also so fucking hurt.

Konstantin is right - I need time. I need so much fucking time.

I don’t know how long I cried for, but when I opened my eyes again, I was wrapped up in bed, and Konstantin was nowhere to be found. Huh, I must have cried myself to sleep.

Putting pillows on either side of the twins, I wrapped the nightgown Caterina gave me around my body and plodded barefoot downstairs. The house is quiet, but I can hear voices as I get downstairs and near the kitchen.

“... yes, asshole, she’s safe and here with the twins. Yes, fucking twins, you’re an uncle now, so congratulations.” It was Konstantin, and he was on the phone. “She’s here now; wanna talk to her?”

My eyes widen when he says this, and I realise that he must have caught my scent when I came downstairs. He turns around and gives me one of those smiles that get my heart beating every time and hands the phone over to me. “It’s Fenriz,” he says.

I swallow hard and nod before taking the phone from him, remembering the lies that woman spewed about my family in Vegas. I’ll question him about it someday, but not right now.

“Hey, Fenriz,”

I hear a sharp intake of breath on the other side, then a long sigh. “Lilith,” he says softly before my heart drops at the sound of him sobbing. “You’re safe.”

Yet again, I feel tears stream down my cheeks after I thought I was all cried out. “Yes,” I croak out, “I am.”

“That’s good, that’s so good to hear,” he says, sniffing. “I tried to help; I wanted to be at Konstantin’s side as he looked for you, but Father has-”