Once My Mate, Always My Mate novel Chapter 16

Sabrina's POV

"So, when did the band get back together?" Josey asks, pointing at the three men in my office.

Anthony shrugs and Hunter ignores her completely while Aiden tries to open his mouth, Josey raising her hand to stop him from talking.

There is this feeling when one is done with a guy, well almost done with him but you can somehow feel the attraction and all that love lose itself, leaving the system little by little and somehow that feels like a ton of weight was removed from your chest, that dead weight that was pressing on to you and you could not breathe, but now you were able to. Looking at Aiden, I somehow felt like that, like I was looking at a guy I once knew and I didn't anymore.

Nothing had changed about his appearance, what I once found attractive I still to right now but in no way will I e willing to lay down my life for his. The craze, the obsession to have him to myself was short of its power today and I won't say this out loud but this bothered me because I once knew how it felt to love him, to love Aiden.

It bothers me that someone decided for me that I will feel nothing for the man standing in front of me with his tall physique, the same body I wanted to mount every damn second. Wanted to, past tense... It is like we were living a new life, of which we are but it wasn't to my choosing. Someone is busy pulling the strings and that is my problem. When do I decide how my life will unfold? Have it all written out for me not just in the stars but in the books and scrolls?

I know, I sound like an ungrateful bitch who is not happy she only has Xander to deal with but I am not partly grateful. I would be stupid and pretty much a hypocrite if I did not see the chance I have been given, a chance to be with Xander and a chance where he won't have to share with me but there is this little feeling, the feeling of how much more will I have to change about my life and live it according to the powers that be?

A few days ago, I thought I was the power but I am shown once again that some control the things I can't, the one thing I want to control is not in my grasp.

What is the point of being with Xander if all he is going to be is a secret only a handful can know about? The world will know Aiden as my only but behind closed doors, I go to bed with a different man? A man that is hiding in the shadows but wants to scream to the world that I am his?

I simply cannot allow Xander to endure such a life because he loves me and that is why I stand by my decision to end all ties, whatever has me linked to Aiden must be severed and that is the only way I will abide by any rules laid before me.

"Eleanor has escaped," Hunter says to me. I look at Aiden but e raises his arms in surrender.

"I checked his memory. He had nothing to do with his mother's disappearance." Anthony says to me and I nod my head.

"So, this is the problem I could not finish my breakfast for?" Josey asks and Anthony chuckles.