There's No Love In the Deathzone (BL) novel Chapter 32

Chapter 32: Chapter 31. Where One Walks On Eggshells

Bassena did not know this, but even rarer than sex, Zein had never guided anyone through a kiss before. Since he always sported his mask, and lived where it would be hard for him to take it off, Zein rarely kiss even during sex, much less for guiding.

So this was his first time, and he felt...quite lost.

It was the usual feeling at first, the usual sea of darkness, and rather a lot of corrosive chain from the earlier fight against the Specter. He felt his own water then, a little bit clearer and purer; maybe because they were on a lake, or maybe because of the nearby shard of Setnath.

He was far too focused on the guiding aspect that he barely felt the slight trembling lips of the esper, or the way Bassena tensed with hands gripping the grass tightly. The esper did not even dare to move, barely even breathing, amber eyes widened, unblinking, staring at the guide's closed eyes.

And then it hit Zein; the rush. The water coursed wildly, fierce, pouring into the sea of darkness like a torrent. It sent a jolt into his heart, and set his nerves ablaze, filling his body with a new, tingling sensation.

His body reacted before his mind could, hands clutching the esper's head tighter, bringing them closer. Their lips pressed harder, and Bassena's grip on the poor grass only turned harsher.

Trapped in agonizing prison, Bassena Vaski felt like a deer under the headlights. He couldn't move—he dare not to move. Even when his arms itching with want, and his body filled with pressure—pleasure. So he closed his eyes, but it only grew worse—or better, he couldn't know anymore. The water wrapped him like a tight cocoon, not comforting like usual, but more. It was teasing, flirting, tickling him, and yet he couldn't chase, couldn't touch.

He wasn't allowed to.

And Zein was reacting with oblivious cruelty. It was a new sensation for him; the rush, the intensity, the flood of dopamine. And his instinct as a human being, as a guide, was to chase for it. To crave for it.

And the unfamiliar desire of wanting more prompted his fingers to slide between silvery locks, as he tilted his head, parted his lips, and slipped his tongue between Bassena's gasping lips.

Just as sudden as it started, the kiss and the guiding stopped as Zein pulled away in a haste. Both of them were frozen with shock, and the amber eyes flickered.

"Did you—"

A hand clasped over Bassena's mouth, as Zein bowed his head, staring hard and wide-eyed at the grass and moss between them. He was as surprised as Bassena—probably even more.

To put it simply, he just stepped into a new, unfamiliar chart. And it scared him just how easily he succumb. There was a slight tremble on the hand that he used on the esper's mouth, and they stayed like that, in silence, until both their thumping heart beat slower.

It was only after his hand turned steady that Zein lifted his gaze, and pulled away. His blue eyes no longer shaking, and his face was as impassive as ever, as if nothing has transpired between them.

Bassena felt another towel drop into his head, and watched blankly as the guide stood up. "Hurry up," the older man said, before retreating into the pathway leading upward.

Rather than hurrying up just like Zein told him to, Bassena laid his head on the grass and moss of the lakeside, towel still covering his face.

Dazedly, he muttered into the rich soil. "Wow..."

* * *

"Wow, it really works..." Eugene exclaimed almost breathlessly.

They were standing on the tree roots that formed an island where the shard was. The place had been rejecting everyone else aside from Zein since yesterday, the glowing divine light felt like an impenetrable barrier.

But Bassena said the resistance waned the moment Zein took the shard into his hand, and so they tried again. Jumping over platforms made of darkness, Zein traveled across the water to come and tamed the shard first. And just like they predicted, the resistance diminished once the shard was in touch with Zein.

"What are you?" Han Shin stared at the guide bewilderedly.

Again, Zein just shrugged. He had told them during dinner last night, that he had no idea either. He just knew the stigma in his neck reacted to the shard.

But that, in itself, was something incredible.

"I've never heard someone had a mark of Setnath before," Eugene muttered, deciding on the stigma's name one-sidedly. After all, it was the same mark as the one carved on the side of the shard.

"It's weirder that it appears on a Guide," Han Shin added.

They were back on the campsite, the shard already hovering with its blinding light. They had taken a bunch of pictures and measurements, and left the tree roots island to discuss the matter over lunch.

As if they were on a picnic.

Thick mats and soft blankets were spread above the soft grass. Sierra and Alice were carrying pillows and building a comfortable nest to laze about while looking at the glittering lake. Balduz made a lavish spread of food since their objective had been reached. And for the same reason, Han Shin took out his prized, expensive, limited-edition box of chocolate.

"What do you mean it's weird? The fragment of Setnath had the power of purification, just like the temple's sanctuary. Isn't it basically a guide's ability?" Bassena laid down on one of the pillows, countering Han Shin's thought.

"Oh! When you put it that way..." the healer nodded, fiddling with the gold ribbon tying the glossy box in front of him.

"Hmm...but, Sir Han..." Eugene seated next to the fiddling healer and said carefully. "Wouldn't it mean we can no longer proceed without Mister Zen?"

Han Shin gasped, as well as Anise. The three researchers suddenly entered an emergency meeting around the chocolate box.

"What to do, Sir? I know just the result from this means a success for our project, but for 'that' plan—"

"Yeah, it won't be enough with just one shard..."

"But to collect enough for a fragment, I don't think two or three will be enough,"

"That's obvious, but..."

"If we can bring it home, don't you think we will find some solution?"

"If we combined the resources between Mortix and Trinity..."

Zein stared at the sizable box seating between the whispering three with a pang of longing and asked. "What plan?"

He didn't ask it to the three people who suddenly had a quiet internal conference even though everyone could still hear them. He couldn't ask the tanker who was still busy being everyone's butler, or Sierra who was helping him. And he couldn't ask Ron, obviously, since the scout was also an outsider.

So Zein asked Bassena, who lay beside him and stared at him with a stunned, dumbfounded expression.

"What?" the guide asked, confused by Bassena's blank response.

The esper blinked, and asked slowly, in a rather quiet voice. "I thought you'll avoid me..."

"...why would I do that?" Zein looked taken aback, the blue eyes blinked in confusion. They just stared at each other in bewilderment-filled silence for a while. "Do you think I'm some kind of teenager going through puberty or something?"

That was probably the longest time Zein saw Bassena look so flustered since he knew the esper. The man just opened and closed his mouth, the way his mind churned could be seen from the flickering amber eyes.

Bassena was, indeed, having turbulence inside his brain. He was still honestly surprised that Zein entertained his request for a kiss yesterday. Sure, the esper meant it, but he also instantly saw how the guide wasn't a man who was keen on physical, so his effort to flirt was mostly just a figure of speech. That was why he never felt disappointed even when Zein shot down his attempt in a heartbeat.

In this regard, Bassena was just a man facing his first love with all caution and full-on confusion. He talked big, but threaded carefully, braking himself on time to not cross the line. Rather than fulfilling his desire, he just didn't want Zein to be any more distant.

The Guildmaster always told Han Shin that Bassena still retained some of his childhood innocence that failed to grow since he was practically raised as a living weapon, trapping that inner child inside the sea of darkness.

And it was always quite apparent in a matter that wasn't about the sentinel world.

Like how he was dazed for a whole night because Zein unexpectedly decided to accept his proposal for a kiss, and even did something more. And how he spent a sleepless time agonizing over whether the guide would start to get cold again, distancing himself like the first day again because quite frankly, Zein had left him in a hurry yesterday.

Even earlier, he was carefully watching Zein's reaction (which had no difference) and laid himself beside the guide, watching closely for any indication of the older man's repulsion or anything.

Basically, Bassena had been walking on eggshells since the kiss. And it was written all over his face right now.