BEAUTIFULLY UNFINISHED novel Chapter 67

SIXTY-SIX

H A R R Y

He's sleeping.

He's sleeping peacefully.

He's beautiful.

I can't wait to carry him on my arms.

But...

I don't feel it.

Why do I don't feel it?

I don't feel what I felt when I saw Ben.

It's not here.

I don't feel it.

This one is different.

I began walking back to Audrey's room and now that our baby's out, this goes out all over the tabloids quicker than a second. I guess it's already out on the tabloids now. I guess it's already swirling around the entire media since the media online is faster than the speed of light when it comes to issues about me.

God I wish they would all just stop.

I halted once I saw Rose. She was all alone and I took the chance to walk up to her to talk. I've been wanting to talk to her again the second I saw her getting inside the plane with Louis.

"Rose." I say.

She quickly looks at me over her shoulder and spins around. "Harry."

I smiled with tight-lipped. "You're alone?" I asked.

"I came with Niall. Louis is catching up with us. He kind of needed more time to get Ben back to sleep." She explains.

The elevator chimes and marked a number 2 that shows where we were in. I was cursing and praying at the same time that it would be an empty elevator so I would have much time to talk with Rose with no people distracting us from having a serious talk. I know I need to do this.

As soon as it finally opens, voila.

It was spotless.

Empty.

No one was riding it.

Perfect.

I grinned as I gestured for Rose to go inside first. Both of us got inside and I quickly pressed the button to close the door so no one would interrupt us.

"Have you visited Audrey?" I asked.

She shakes her head in response. "I tried to visit her but I heard her saying to Niall that she doesn't wanna see me here so I didn't continue walking inside of her room."

I sigh.

"I'll be waiting for Louis to come so we'll visit her together." She adds.

I quickly pressed the emergency stop button without second thoughts and she quickly jolted from what I've done. She looked at me confusingly but I didn't care if there were CCTVs in here. I really wanted to talk to her personally.

"Harry what are you doing!" She startled.

"We need to talk."

"Stop the crap." She spits.

I try to hold her but she pushes me away.

"There's a camera in here. And there's nothing left to talk about!" She says.

"It's only video, they won't hear us talk. Rose please, listen to me for just a while." I reached for her arm.

She quickly pulled her hand away from me. "What is there left to talk about? What are we going to talk about this time huh? And why the hell do you always do this?!" She asks angrily.

I couldn't answer her.

"I'm still so mad at you for what happened! Fucking me was a sin and I didn't know you would go that far. I didn't know you'd intentionally get me pregnant!" She raises her voice at me.

"That's why I wanna talk to you. Im sorry. I'm so sorry for getting you pregnant. I don't know what got into me but that time but I couldn't help it."

"Couldn't help it? That's your reason? You couldn't help it? Why didn't you pull it off? Was that so hard to do?! Was it so hard to pull your dick out of me?!" She screams at my face.

"You don't know how much I've longed for you for that night to happen again. You don't know how many times I play that one night stand I had with you inside my head a couple of times and even until now I still think of that!" I muffled.

"You're insane." She spits.

I stared at silently.

"That's not a definite reason." She adds.

I sigh.

"And I don't wanna hear this. I don't wanna hear anything coming from you. I don't wanna hear your sugar-coated words." She sounded annoyed.

Am I really annoying her too much?

"Stop with this Harry. Just. Fucking. Stop." She says firmly.

I got quiet.

"This is going nowhere. This is pointless. This is absurdly superfluous. I'm getting married to Louis and you're married to Audrey. So what do you still want to happen?!" She raises her voice at me and I could tell she's mad.

She silenced the hell out of me.

"We've been finished since the day you married Audrey." She adds.

I bent my head down and held my nape. "I just wanted you to know..."

I pulled my head up and stared at my beautiful Rose. Her eyes looked tired of this. Her tears were on her eyes but I know she was trying so hard not to cry. I wish I didn't make her cry that much lately. I love her too much but Louis loves her way much more.

"You're better with Louis." I say softly.

She looks at me firmly.

"He loves you so much." I said.

"I know." She answers.

"He loves you more than the love I can even give you." I muffled as I feel myself tearing up.

Her tears slowly fell on her cheeks but she's keeping herself hard as a rock.

"I couldn't offer you what Louis gives. He makes you laugh. He makes you smile. He's a lot of a better man than me for you and I know he will never hurt you and he won't make you cry." I walk closer to her and wiped her tears that were wetting her face.

She takes sharp breathing in and exhales as she bends her head down.

"He loves you Miranda. He loves you very much. He sacrificed a lot of things for you." I say.

I gently grabbed her chin and pulled up her face to me. Even though this thing that I'm doing right now is hurting me, I know it's what's best to do. This is what's left for me to do. This is the right thing for a married man like me to do.

"All you wanted was to be set free and I think I've finally learned to let you go. It's not because I wanna do this but because you're already happy without me." I muffled.

"All I ever wanted was to make you happy." I added while my voice trembles.

"So I'm going to make you happy. I'm finally giving you up." I said softly.

She shakes her head. "You've given up on me the day you exchanged your I Do's with Audrey."

"Everything is so complicated between us. Everything happened in the wrong time for us. Every beautiful thing is undone." I answered.

"No. I think we're destined to be with who we are now. I just wish you happiness with Audrey and your newly born baby boy." She smiles ruefully as she wipes her tears.

I placed my palm over her growing bump and more tears escaped from her eyes as I look at her. I know her love her very much and this feeling that I have for her will always be with me no matter where I am.

"As much as I want to be a father to our second child, I can't. If the people will know about this then your reputation is on the verge of it." I say.

I mustn't tell her about what Louis and I talked back in New York. Louis knelt before me. Louis begged me not to tell her about that conversation we made a few days ago but I know Louis has a point. If I won't do this, if I won't keep my mouth shut, Rose's reputation will be on the line. People will label her again. People will say meaner things to her again. People will hate her much more. And that's the least thing I don't want to happen to her.