Her Heart Her Terms (Lily and Xavier) novel Chapter 139

Chapter 139 

Lily’s grip on Hayden’s hand tightened. “What do you mean by that?” 

“Lily, I’m in so much pain.” He couldn’t muster the strength to hold her hand in return. His face was worn and haggard. “Every time I close my eyes, all I see is that person lying in a pool of blood…” 

Suddenly, he yanked his hand away and began hitting his head forcefully. “I deserve to die! Why did I have to go out that day? She wouldn’t have died if it weren’t for me!” 

Lily immediately stood up and grabbed his wrists to stop him, but his violent movements caused her to sway. Tears spilled from her eyes as they splashed onto her clothes and his hands. 

“It would’ve been someone else even if it wasn’t you that day. She was deliberately looking for an accident. Do you understand? Her family has already admitted it…” 

“No! Maybe… if she had been given more time, she might have changed her mind. She might have decided to face her illness and live…” Hayden was already trapped in a spiral of despair. 

He often imagined himself in the worst state. He would rather believe that the victim could have escaped her obsessive mindset than in his innocence. 

He struck his head repeatedly. Lily struggled with all her strength to restrain him but failed. 

“Maybe I wouldn’t have hit her if I had driven just a little slower! She wouldn’t have died if I had swerved and crashed into a tree! Why didn’t I brake earlier?” 

Hayden was overwhelmed by one wave of self–doubt after another. He clutched his head in agony and knelt on the hospital bed. 

Lily was equally disheveled as she collapsed onto the bed, holding his hands as tightly as possible. “Hayden, please don’t scare me. Calm down. It’s truly not your fault. ” 

She tried desperately to calm him down, but Hayden remained mired in his pain no matter what she said. 

He lashed out at himself endlessly. Her words were unable to reach him no matter how hard she tried. 

“It’s my fault. It’s all my fault. I’m a murderer. I should go to prison. I deserve to rot in prison.” Hayden suddenly leaped off the bed as he spoke. The momenturn caused Lily, who was holding his hands, to stumble. She was forcibly dragged off the bed by him. 

Her forehead hit the edge of the bed, and her vision darkened instantly. However, she refused to let go of his hands. 

She stood up with Hayden’s strength for support and pressed the emergency button by the bedside. “Dr. Dawson…” 

The quiet hospital floor instantly erupted into chaos. 

The sound of hurried footsteps, Hayden’s labored breathing and murmurs, and Lily’s pounding heartbeat surged into Lily’s mind all at once. She was completely frozen apart from instinctively holding onto Hayden. 

Soon, Xander rushed in with a few doctors, who restrained Hayden and pulled Lily aside. 

“Ms. Joyner, please wait outside. You can trust Dr. Dawson” The resident doctor hurriedly led 1 

led Lily ou 

out of the ward. 

Lily regained her senses and grabbed the resident doctor’s arm. “Didn’t you say his condition was improving? Why is he acting like this?” 

She had never seen Hayden like this before. He was frantic, panicked, and consumed by overwhelming guilt. He hit himself repeatedly as if he were his enemy!