Demons From the Past novel Chapter 25

The sky is tragically beautiful.

A graveyard of stars.

*************

I had no idea what I was doing here.

I sighed as I gazed up at the sky, the stars blinked down at me. The past few weeks had gone by in a daze.

I was finding it hard to get over the trauma.

Aiden was in jail and there was still no sign of Kade.

I couldn't help but shudder when I thought about him.

No one had seen or heard about him ever since the incident.

Maybe he'd finally given up and left for good?

I sighed again and looked around the vacant football field. I was supposed to meet Skylar at the library two hours ago but somehow I had just ended up here.

The grass was a little damp, I could feel it soaking through my dress, making me shiver from cold. But I didn't care.

I just wanted to be alone today.

Today wasn't any ordinary day.

My throat tightened and I felt a familiar pain in my chest. The pain which had been consuming me for exactly three years now.

Star gazing was something I used to do with Trevor. Sometimes we'd talk and sometimes we'd just sit for hours looking at the sky.

He taught me that we didn't always need to use words to communicate, sometimes silence could speak the loudest, and sometimes fleeting moments could say things you never had the courage to tell someone.

"I know you loved me Trev." I whispered to the sky. "I just wish it was easier to accept that you're gone."

Was it ever going to be easy?

Could I ever be truly happy?

Could I ever feel whole again?

"Thought you'd be here." A familiar voice broke me from my thoughts.

"Nate." I breathed.

It was pretty dark, I could just make out his tall frame standing a few feet away from me. My heart started beating erratically against my chest as he made way towards where I was sitting.

We sat in silence, both of us just gazing at the stars.

Sometimes silence can speak volumes.

Even fleeting moments can speak multitudes if they're with someone you love.

"How did you find me?" I finally managed to whisper.

He turned his head to look at me, his expression was serious.

"I'll always find you Verena Dawson." He murmured, "I will always find you."

I smiled at that.

"I need you to always find me Nate Cohen."

So I'll never have to be afraid of getting lost.

I leaned my weight against him. My back was to his front, my head rested against his chest. I felt him go rigid for a moment before his body relaxed.

"I never told you how he died." I spoke wistfully, almost to myself.

He didn't answer me. He didn't need to answer me. He just needed to be here.

"Trevor always wanted to be a hero. Even when we were kids, the only thing he wanted to play was cops and robbers." I smiled, I knew it was a sad smile.

"It was inevitable, no one could change his mind. He was so happy when he got recruited in the Bureau, and we were all so proud of him. At first it wasn't that hard, he wasn't away much and he wasn't away too long. But then after a while they started sending him away for these extended operations, we wouldn't see him for weeks. When I asked Trevor about it he just shrugged it off, he told me it was normal when you were part of the Special Forces and it just meant that he was good at what he did."

My voice was getting a little choked up. I sighed when I felt Nate's firm hands go around my waist reassuringly. I took in a deep breath before speaking again, "He never told us about his job in detail, I knew it was confidential. I knew he kept quiet to keep us safe, the less we knew about the things he did the safer we were. Three years ago he got assigned for another operation, it was the longest one yet, he was going away for whole month. He told me that he'd be working undercover so he wouldn't be able to stay in touch, he said that this mission could be their biggest breakthrough yet."

Nate's hold on me tightened, like he knew what was coming next. I tried to swallow the growing lump in my throat, "I didn't hear from him for a month, but that was okay. Trevor always came back home. I kept telling myself he'd come back. But time kept passing and he didn't come. One month turned into two, at this point we were all freaking out. We'd called his office multiple times but they just told us to be patient and that they'd tell us if they heard anything. So this one day I'm sitting at home zoned out, worrying about my brother, when suddenly the doorbell rings. I jump to my feet and run to the door hoping, praying that I see Trevor when I open the door, instead, I'm greeted by two officers. I call mom and dad over and we were told that the operation Trevor was sent to had failed, it all backfired. They told me that my brother was dead. At first we didn't accept it. I mean my brother couldn't be dead. He was still so young so full of life, he had so much ahead of him, they hadn't even been able to recover the body. But days passed and he never returned. It eventually sunk in, that he was never coming back. We had a funeral, but it was only a formality. It was easier not to deal with it I guess. My father immersed himself in his work, he didn't have time for his family anymore, and my mother wasn't really different either, she decided that the best way to move on was to travel, I hardly saw her at home, she was either in Paris or Egypt or someplace I'd never heard of."

I wiped the stubborn tears that fell from my eyes. "My parents decided to start a new life, but I guess they forgot that one of their kids was still alive, or maybe they just didn't want me to be a part of their new life. Maybe they decided I wasn't worth it. They try to make up for it of course, they give me expensive gifts, lots of money, everything I ask for. They try to make up for their guilt by giving me everything I need, but they fail to realize that what I need is my family. They fail to see that they're not the only ones who lost a son, I lost my brother too." My shoulders were shaking now. If Nate wasn't supporting me right now I would have collapsed.

For a moment our breaths were the only things that could be heard. Nate didn't say anything. He didn't tell me how sorry he was for me or how it would get better. He just held me.