Demons From the Past novel Chapter 31

"The tragedy of life is what dies inside a man while he lives." -Albert Schweitzer

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|Nate|

The water lapped at my feet as I stood at the edge of the sea shore. The sky was dark, but the whole beach was illuminated by an ethereal glow. The warm wind whipped through my hair. The whole area seemed to be deserted and for some reason, I didn't mind at all. Everything was so serene, I'd never experienced peace like this before. Everything seemed too vivid and beautiful to be real.

I felt a presence beside me.

I turned to look, and was greeted by a familiar face.

He smiled at me. That smile bought back so many beautiful memories.

"Dad" I choked out.

"Hello, son." My father greeted me.

He looked so young and carefree, like the man he used to be before he became an alcoholic.

"This is all just a dream, right? None of this is real?" I asked dejectedly.

"What are you feeling right now Nate?" My father asked.

I felt confused but answered him truthfully nonetheless. "I feel at peace, content with myself. For the first time in my life I don't feel numb, I don't feel empty. I'm happy. For the first time in my life I feel loved."

He smiled again, his eyes crinkling at the corners as he did so. "This isn't just a dream son, these emotions you're experiencing right now, they're real."

I ran a hand through my hair. "Am I dead?" I finally asked.

My father laughed. "No, you're still alive. You're a fighter."

"I get that from you." I grinned.

His expression grew serious, "I never told you how proud I am of you son. I'm so proud of the man you've become."

I could feel my chest tighten. "I miss you dad. Mom misses you."

He squeezed my shoulder, "I wish I could tell you how sorry I am for putting you through all that pain. You should know that I'm not proud of the man I had become. I let you and your mother down so many times, but you both never gave up on me. You and Julia were always too good for me. You kept loving a man who deserved nothing but hate." He let out a shaky breath, "I have always loved you and your mother, I loved you even when my actions spoke otherwise. I know that doesn't make up for the things I did or what I put you through but you should know that I never stopped loving you."

For a while we just stood there in silence watching the waves rise and fall.

"I know dad, and mom knows too." I spoke softly.

And then, I said something I'd never thought I could, "I forgive you dad. I think I forgave you a long time ago, I just acknowledged it right now."

I could hear the pain behind his voice when he spoke. "How could you forgive me so easily, after everything I put you through?"

I smiled. "Forgiving someone you love isn't difficult, you just have to remember all the good moments they gave you and choose to forgive them for the bad ones. Forgiving others is easy, all you have to do is stop holding on to the hate pulling you down. It's forgiving yourself that's hard."

I turned my head up to the sky and looked at the stars blinking down at us.

"I used to despise myself. I used to believe I was a monster. But Verena changed everything, she made me realize that the only reason I was suffering was because I refused to let go of the pain. She made me see beyond the darkness inside me, she made me find the light."

"You love her." He said gently.

An involuntary smile formed on my lips.

"I do." I didn't hesitate with my response.

I turned to look at him, "I think it's time you forgave yourself dad."

I could see the tears shining in his eyes. "I love you my boy."

His voice was fading, the landscape becoming blurred.

"Never regret the past, Nate. The past is what makes you who you are, and you should be proud of the man you are today."

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"Nate, wake up!" someone was calling out my name.

I groaned as I blinked my eyes slowly, to regain focus.

"Where am I?" I asked, my mind still groggy.

"Nate, it's me Trevor. Kade's men drugged you and bought you here. Where's Verena? Is she safe?" He asked urgently.

I finally regained my senses. I was in what seemed like a storage room, it was too dark to make out much. The room was completely bare and a single bulb blinked overhead. I tried to move but couldn't, my arms and legs were bound together.

I felt someone move behind me. It took me a moment to realize that it was Trevor. We were both bound and sitting back to back on the cold floor.

"Where is Verena?" Trevor demanded again.

"She's safe." I responded and I saw his shoulders visibly relax.

"Thank you. I know you saved her life."

"You don't need to thank me, I'd do anything for her." I told him truthfully.

I chuckle left my lips and Trevor gave me a baffled look, like I'd suddenly grown two heads.

"You do realize that this is the first time we're having a civil conversation." I chuckled again.

This time Trevor grinned too. "Yeah you're right. Sorry for behaving like an asshole before. I'm a little protective over my baby sister. You're not such a bad guy."