The Brutal Alpha's Tender Daughter novel Chapter 14

His fingertips brushed over my cheek and he huskily said "You've no idea how much this means to me.

I smiled shyly at him, because I knew that it was a tradition in the shifter's world to save oneself for their fated mate. This did not automatically include kissing, but seeing as no one had ever been interested in me that way, the problem had never even arised.

"Was that your first kiss as well?", I wanted to know and saw his eyes glaze over with guilt.

My heart felt like it was stabbed, but I reminded myself that a mere kiss should not matter. However, I felt sick to my stomach just thinking of my mate kissing someone else.

I did not know how I was supposed to react on those news so I just remained silent and tried to not let my emotions get the better of me.

"I'm sorry, it's not, but.....but otherwise I saved myself for you.", Levin stuttered and had a hopeful look on his face.

I smiled at him, wanting to reassure him. And me.

It was just kissing - I could handle that. At least I hoped so.

"I'm glad."

I had no idea how hard it would had been for me to cope with my mate not having saved himself for me, when the mere thought of him kissing someone before me had me almost physically sick.

Before any more words could be spoken between us, a voice from the door reminded us that dinner was being served.

I took a deep breath, because I knew that my parents wanted to use us having dinner as an opportunity to announce me becoming the future Luna of the Crescent moon pack to the higher ranked pack members, who sometimes ate with us.

I had no idea what reactions to expect, but I was certain that everything would change from here onwards.

In a good or bad way I could not say.

"Are you okay?", I heard the voice of my mate ask me uncertainly.

I turned my head from the car window towards him and smiled softly at him.

"Better than okay."

And I truely was.

We were currently on our way to Levin's pack and each mile that took me farther away from the Mercy pack made me feel better. Safer. Independent.

Yesterday's dinner had gone better than I had thought. The higher ranked wolves of the Mercy pack were more than pleased when they had learnt that I would become the future Luna of the Crescent Moon pack.

It had been the first time I had detected pride and joy in their eyes when they had looked at me.

Tears had escaped my eyes when I had thought about how much Silas hated it here and now I was leaving him too.

"I'm sorry!", I had whispered again and again into his chest.

Silas had tried to console me, but I had known that I needed to get everything off my chest.

I was sorry for the unfairness that he had been born into the Mercy pack.

I was sorry for our parents' cruel leadership and their dogmatic beliefs, not letting anyone else have a say or a different opinion.

I was sorry that Silas had been as much as a loner as I had been, because friendships had been hard to find in the Mercy pack.

I was sorry that my big brother had always been there for me, but I had never been able to return the favour.

I was sorry that I was leaving him behind.

But most of all I was sorry that I was leaving and being happy about it.

It broke my heart knowing that Silas was still here and at the mercy of my father, but I could not be more relieved and happier about leaving this godforsaken place.