BEAUTIFULLY UNFINISHED novel Chapter 59

FIFTY-EIGHT

H A R R Y

I know I shouldn't have left my own wedding, but this is much more important than being stuck there with all those fake people trying to be happy for us.

When Louis parked his car, so did I. I gazed at where he brought me, and I was very surprised why we came here this late with me. I see him hopping off from his car and then he stared at me eagerly. I quickly turned off the engine of my car and stepped out too.

He hasn't said any word to me and I can't seem to say anything to him after what happened inside the hotel.

But it was better that he accidentally heard and found out about it. I shouldn't let him have the responsibility of becoming a father to my baby inside Rose. I've lost that chance with Ben and now I wanna make it up to her.

I wanna show her I can be a great father. I wanna show her I can raise our kid right. But I didn't actually thought I'd really get her pregnant after coming inside her. I should've waited. I should've cancelled my wedding.

Why did I even get myself into this stupid marriage? Now I wanna divorce Audrey tomorrow because I'm having another baby with Miranda.

But what about my baby with Audrey?

Argh! If it wasn't for that baby inside her, I won't be marrying her.

Louis enters a door and I followed him inside. We walked together silently. I noticed that nobody was around here but why were we here?

He opens another door and I went inside the room while I followed him. He turned on the lights of the entire place and it felt like everything all flashed back to me as I stand in this room. Louis walks towards the stage and he eyes me to follow him. So I did.

When we were both standing on top of the stage, we faced the empty seated room. I remember that spotlight flashed before me, almost fifteen years ago. I remember standing on top of this stage. I remember how nervous I was. I remember how Uncle Simon sat there and looked at me like I couldn't get through the audition. I remember the feeling of my first audition for X Factor. I remember everything and it's all flashing before me, like a movie playing.

"Do you remember this place Harold?" I hear Louis finally talking.

I moved my head to him. "Yeah. Who would even forget this place?"

My eyes scanned through the entire room. "It's where we were formed."

"Where it all started." He added.

I nodded.

I'm actually nervous why Louis brought me here. I'm nervous because I don't know what he's thinking. I know he's immensely mad at me after what happened a while ago. Did he really find out that that baby inside Rose is mine? But why is he just standing there? Why is he standing far away from me? If he's mad he should've thrown himself at me.

"This room. This stage. This crowd. That spotlight." He pointed.

I'm tense right now to be honest.

"It's all memorable to me. All of it. It's where I met my brothers, not blood-related though but you know what I mean." He says.

I turned myself to Louis. "Why are we here Lou?" I couldn't help but ask.

He looks far ahead with jaws clenched.

"Why did you bring me here? What are we even here for?" I asked.

Finally he moved his head to me and stares at me. I could see so much anguish with the way he looks right into my eyes. He never looked at me that way and it's pretty damn scary.

I gulped.

"Don't you find this place memorable Harry?" He asks.

"I do find it very memorable." I answered him.

He smirks. "To the five of us, right?"

I nod.

"But remember, we were the first one who talked among the five of us back in the day during auditions." He says.

I nod again.

"It's where I told you you'll make it through the auditions." He begins to walk closer to me.

Every step feels like her a hungry lion, ready to eat a tiny little scared mouse.

"It's where I took a photo with you cos I knew back in the day you'll be a famous artist." He adds.

His voice is heavy and sounds dark.

"It's where I wished you good luck cos you were nervous as hell and you were sick. It's where we met the other boys. It's where we started learning on how to dance, to sing, to compete as a band, to become close with four other boys that we've never ever met in our lives before." He continues.

He finally stands before me. We were both quiet the entire time as we stand in front of each other. Our eyes were looking at each other but I can't find anything to say to Louis. He's actually scaring me right now. It's just me and him. Liam, Niall and Zayn aren't here to stop him from doing something to me. But I know Louis won't do anything reckless just for Rose.

Or will he?

He loves her so much. He's so mad at me. This is the second... No, third time that I hurt him. First, with Audrey. Second, with Rose having me as Ben's father. And third, that baby inside Rose. He must be intensely mad.

Say anything Harry. But what? Apologize? I think that won't be enough for all the things I've done behind Louis back. Louis is a wise man even though he acts like he's not. He's more intellectual than me. But right now I don't know what's on his mind. I don't know what he's thinking as he looks at me like he needs to hit me.

"But do you know how I feel right now Harry?" He finally asked.

My breathing hitched.

I don't wanna hear this. I know I've hurt him again. I know I'm such a terrible friend. I know I did something very awful. I got his girlfriend pregnant once again. If I was him, I'd be totally mad. I'd be hitting that person even though we've spent so many years together as a band. I've wasted our friendship. I've wasted all those years that we've been such great friends. I've broken Louis' trust on me.

"Do you know what I feel right now after what I heard from your mouth a while ago?" He added.

Shit. He really heard it.

"Louis.." I call out his name softly.

"Shut up and listen to me Harry." He spits.

Out of the blue, Louis grabbed my collar and pulled me roughly close to him. I gasped and didn't expect him to do it. The grip on my collar is getting tighter as I see his knuckles getting red. His hands are shaking too.

He's really really mad.

And I'm really really scared.

"I trusted you." He says.

I take deep breath in.

"You were my friend." He spits.

Tears gathered behind my eyelids fast.

"You were a brother to me Harold. You were my best friend." He adds.

I bent my head down. I'm too embarrassed to face him. He pushed me hard on my chest which made my cock my head backwards. He releases me but we were still standing at each other. I can't find any words to answer him. I'm guilty. I feel terrible.

"You promised me." He says.

I sigh heavily. I'm still not looking at him cos I couldn't dare to.

"You promised me you'll love Audrey and you'll be faithful to her because I told you to. You told me she's the one. You told me that Harold and I haven't forgotten about that night. But now you're stealing Miranda away from me as well?!" He yells at me.

I slowly pulled my head up to him and he was already crying. There were tears on his cheeks.

"You betrayed me! But this time is so much worst! You fucked my woman, Harry! You fucked her and got her pregnant!" He raises his voice at me.

"I'm sorry." I muffled.

"You're sorry? Those same words are coming out from your mouth again and I'm sick of hearing it actually. But can your sorry change the damage you've done this time?!" He yells.

I didn't answer. I couldn't answer cos it's true.

"You should've thought about it before putting your goddamn cock! You should've thought about it before intentionally coming inside her! You should've thought about our friendship Harry! Fuck you!!" He screams again.

He breathes.

"That was my woman you were fucking!" He yells louder.

His fists curled into a ball. He takes a breath in through his nose and exhales heavily off his mouth.

"Louis... I don't know what to say." I admitted. "Cos anything I'd say wouldn't change your mind. I know you're really mad at me."

He got quiet.

"But I want you to know how terribly guilty I am for getting Rose pregnant again." My voice shakes.

I shake my head sideways and I feel Louis' pain too. I feel his pain and anger. I feel it running all over my body and it's making me feel more and more guilty about it.

"I didn't know what I was thinking. It all got into me that moment. All I thought about was to get her pregnant and for us to have another baby." I croaked.

I can't even think straight

But I can tell

That you were just with him

And I'll still be a fool

I'm a fool for you'

I take a long pause and stopped from playing. My tears are blurring my vision. I quickly thumbed away my tears and placed my hands back on the keys. I began playing the chorus and sang it while choking a sob midway through it.

'Just a little bit of your heart

Just a little bit of your heart

Just a little bit is all I'm asking for'

I'm having a hard time finishing the chorus without crying. I'm hurting too much. It hurts so much I hate it.

'I don't ever tell you

How I really feel

Cause I can't find the words to

Say what I mean

And nothing's ever easy

That's what they say

I know I'm not your only

But I'll still be a fool'

Suddenly I heard a sound of the chair. I stopped playing and moved my head to the crowd. I squinted my eyes a little and saw someone sitting down.

It was Liam.

"Very sensual song you're singing there. You alright mate?" He calls out my attention.

I sigh.

"How'd you know I was here?" I asked him back so I won't answer him.

"I know you'd be here. Louis just left. He was intensely mad." Liam narrated.

I feel sick to my stomach.

"Something happened?" He asked.

I stand from the chair and began walking off from the stage. I went near Liam and he looks at me wearily.

"Are you alright Harry?" He asks.

"I just wanna go home Li." I say.

"What about Audrey? She's still waiting at the reception for you."

I shake my head. "I don't feel like going back. Tell her I feel sick."

I walk away from Liam.

"Harry." He calls out again.

I stopped.

"Are you okay?" He asked me again.

I exhaled heavily and glared at him over my shoulder.

"I'm not." I answered.