Taming The Wild CEO novel Chapter 84

Eyes narrowing, desire still glittering in those baby blues as he watched her with the same intensity that he had kissed her. Out of nowhere the image of a predator stalking its prey raced through Ella’s head. Whoever this man was he was dangerous. Maybe not physically, because she didn’t think he would harm her, but on some deeper, more personal level. “I asked who you were,” she said, unnerved by his silence.

“Javier.”

“Javier,” she repeated, sampling the sound of his name on her lips. She waited for some flicker of recognition, some memory to go with the name. When none came, her head began to throb in earnest. Pressing her fingers to her temple, she closed her eyes and ran his name, his face, his kiss through her mind again.

Nothing. No inkling that she knew him, that she remembered him. All she encountered were more blank pages. Her heart picked up a panicked beat at that realization, and she was forced to acknowledge that her memory was filled with far too many blank pages. Swallowing hard, she opened her eyes and found his gaze fastened on her as though he were sizing her up. The idea that he might be, unnerved her almost as much as her inability to remember.

“Do I know you?” she blurted out and immediately regretted asking the question. Of course, she must know the man, she reasoned. Why else would he be at the hospital? And why else would he have planted that passionate, soul-gripping kiss on her?

“Yeah. I suppose you could put it like that,” he said, his mouth hardening, his dark brows slashing in a frown, “considering that I am your fiancé.”

“My fiancé?” Her eyes widened in both surprise and shock. “I have a fiancé,” she said to herself but loud enough for him to pick it up.

Javier clenched his jaw as the color drained from her face. He felt as though he had been kicked in the gut. For a few moments when she had kissed him back, he had thought, well, he had allowed himself to believe that she still loved him, that she had forgiven him for investigating her dad and her past. He had thought that now that she had learned the truth from her mother, she would forgive him and they could move on. Yet none of those were true.

Frustration and disappointment slammed at him like punishing fists. He jammed his hands into the pockets of his pants to keep from reaching for her again. Damn, what an idiot he had been. Only an idiot would have let himself believe that somehow she would forgive him. That he was worth forgiving.

Now as he stared at her too pale face, and saw the bewilderment clouding her dark brown eyes, he bit back a curse at his own lack of caution. How could he have been so impatient and reckless? The doctor had warned him that there had been something that held Ella back from waking up. He should have guessed that something terrible might happen. The psychiatrist had told him and her parents that a traumatic incident had happened and caused her to refuse to face reality. He should have taken it easy. Instead, he had pushed her too much and even kissed her.

He had not heeded the doctors’ warnings to take things slowly. No, he had been too eaten up with guilt for failing to protect her and he had been scared that he might lose her forever. When she had finally opened her eyes, looked up at him, and had not turned away, he had been too staggered by relief to think beyond the fact that she was all right. That she was back here with him again. That the storm had truly passed.

Then she had touched him. And his ability to think at all had gone right out of the window. Her touch, the softness of her voice after two weeks without both had been like a lifeline being thrown to a drowning man. So, he had snatched it, and held on to it with both fists. Kissing her had never been an option, it had been a must, a necessity to him just like taking his next breath. And without considering the consequences, he had given in to his own selfish needs.

“We are engaged?”

Her question yanked him from his self-recriminations. “Yes,” he replied, frowning. He did not need to be Einstein to figure out that she was having trouble remembering things. Probably some kind of memory loss because of the blow from the accident to her head. The doctor and police had told him that her head had hit the pavement. What he could not figure out was how extensive that memory loss was or how much he should tell her. If she did not remember him and their relationship, she evidently did not remember that she had been pregnant either. Perhaps this was for the best. If she remembered that she had been pregnant, she would remember losing their baby as well and that would break her heart. He could not bear seeing her in pain and most of all, he did not want her to feel any guilt because truly, he was the one at fault here. But again, there was that one crucial question: could he really live with her not knowing what they had had? Could he live with her not having any recollection or memory of them at all?

“I am sorry,” she said, her voice was soft and fragile. She rubbed at the spot between her brows again. “Things are a bit unclear. And I seem to be having trouble remembering things.”

“It is all right,” Javier tried to reassure her, hating the fact that she felt the need to apologize to him when he was the one who had let her down. He had been the one who had caused all of these to happen. He had been the one who had failed to protect her and put her in harm instead. He should be the one apologizing to her, forever begging for her forgiveness.

“I think it is probably the effect of the medicines on me or something. I am sure I will remember, um,” she paused and swallowed hard, all of a sudden her throat felt dry, “About you. About us.” She frowned again then lifted her hand to massage the bridge of her nose as though she were trying to sort out the jumbled mess inside her head. “Could you tell me what happened?” she dared to ask again. “How did I end up being here?”

At first, Javier hesitated. He was not sure how much he should tell her or if he had already said too much. “I think it might be best if we wait for Doctor Shawthorne to come here. I am sure he will have a better explanation than me.” He rose to his feet and was ready to go outside and find the goddamn doctor or any nurse.

“No.” She caught his hand when he started to leave, and his body tightened at the feel of her fingers against his skin. “Tell me. I want you to tell me.”