Apprehended By My Mate novel Chapter 17

"There is a pack dinner tonight, and I wanted to see if you and Grace would come." He fidgets with the grass not looking at me. I go to open my mouth but nothing comes out. It is like my voice box has become broken. I cannot even remember the last time I was a part of a pack dinner. Derek never allowed me to go because I was an embarrassment to him.

I wanted Conner to be proud to have me as a mate but I knew that would never happen. Who would want me as their mate? Broken and scared Clare with so many walls and scars that it is impossible to count. I wonder if Conner will force me to go? While I was thinking I didn't take note of the way the sun had disappeared and the light had been hidden form the world. It made me wonder if there was any light in world left for me or if it has all gone, leaving me surrounded by darkness for eternity.

I was so deep in my own thoughts that I jumped when Conner carefully placed a hand on my shoulder. I inhaled sharply at the contact but Conner didn't move his hand until a minute of tense silence had passed.

"Sorry, I was trying to get your attention for 5 minutes." I feel crease form at my brows wondering how I was able to be stuck inside my head for so long.

"Sorry. I-I-I would l-li-like to come to the p-p-pa-pack dinner tonight." I stumbled and murmured almost every word that came out of my mouth scared that I will say the wrong thing. I watched as Conner serious expression became light as I watch him show his perfectly white teeth in a smile that just shone with radiance and beauty that I lacked.

"Really you would come to dinner?" his tone is light and fully of hope something that I no longer have.

"If you don't want me to be there than it is ok-" I never got to finish because Conner leaned over and pressed his lips lightly to my cheek. I felt all the air leave my body as my cheek tingled from where his lips were. A warmth spread through my body but that didn't stop the fear that came along with the warmth. Fear made it's way around my body faster than the warmth, leaving me scared and terrified. The moment his lips leave my cheek I can tell he regrets it, he doesn't need to say anything because his eyes holds the answer.

I walk out to find Grace still sitting on the bed playing with some building blocks I gave her before. I walk into the wardrobe to find it full of clothes that don't belong to me. I found something nice that I am going to wear to the pack dinner which is in an hour or so. I pick out a warm sundress that is way too big. I also found a black cardigan to cover the scars on my arms. I brush out my hair letting my long brown hair hang down my back.

I grab Grace and give her a quick bath changing her into a pretty dress. Once we were both dressed I sat on the with Grace playing with her waiting for Conner to come and get us. Siting with Grace makes me wonder what would of happened if I never left Derek. If I was still with Derek I know I wouldn't have Grace and I know the abuse would have gotten worse as I was not able to give Derek a boy.

A sharp knock at the door draws my thoughts away from the dark places inside my mind. The door opens revelling Conner standing there in jeans and a dark shirt. I stand up quickly dressing off my dress even though there is nothing on it. I pick up Grace and rest her on my hip and try to muster up a smile for Conner.